Category Archives: Blog

Should Christian Parents Smack (If It’s Illegal?)

I disagree with the Welsh government!

They are having a consultation because they want to remove a piece of current regulation. It’s not exactly that they want to ban smacking, they want to remove regulation that protects parents, permitting them to use reasonable punishment that doesn’t qualify as a form of abuse.

The reason they want to do this is to guard against abuse, which is a good intent, of course. But the law already guards against abuse, because only reasonable punishment is currently allowed by law. Any unreasonable punishment, which is abuse, is already illegal. That means the change in law doesn’t take any extra measures to guard against abuse, but rather criminalises those currently using reasonable punishment, i.e. smacking.

What’s more, for the Welsh government to interfere with parents on this level would seem to me to be overly intrusive, regulating more than is necessary, reducing our freedom, and could even criminalise decent people who happen to use one reasonable form of discipline. Besides that, if they really wanted to guard against abuse, should they not also put in steps to guard against verbal abuse and psychological abuse by parents?

Now, why that matters is because many Christians use smacking as a means of disciplining children, as do many other parents who aren’t Christians. As Christians we believe it is right to discipline children out of principle. That may include various means, depending on the parent(s), but many would believe smacking to be a viable means of discipline. In fact some would say, necessary.

If you want to have your say then please go and fill in your thoughts on the Welsh government consultation website. You have until 2 April  to respond.

But I also wanted to consider, what happens if this gets passed? How should Christian parents who smack their children respond then if what they’re doing is illegal?

I think the obvious thing to do is to stop smacking. Here’s why…

The decision to smack is not explicitly commanded in the Bible. There are encouragements to discipline, that much is essential. But as far as I can see, there are only a handful of examples of physical punishment by parents in the Bible, and those only in the book of Proverbs where it speaks of a rod of discipline. Here are three of them:

Whoever spares the rod hates their children,
    but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them. (13:24)

Do not withhold discipline from a child;
    if you punish them with the rod, they will not die. (23:13)

A rod and a reprimand impart wisdom,
    but a child left undisciplined disgraces its mother. (29:15)

So there it is – not just smacking, but using a stick to discipline your child. I’ve heard some Christian parents require these verses to be carried out more literally, so that they don’t even smack their children with their own hand. In fact, some explain further that they use their hands for love and so using a stick (or other implement) allows them to only use their hands for love and not for punishment.

However, I think to read it this way as literally mandatory is to not do justice to the type of literature it is. Proverbs is wisdom literature. It’s a collection of wise sayings. It’s good advice on how to live as God’s people. It’s not a set of rules to be obeyed precisely but principles to be implemented.

Therefore, when it instructs on using the rod, the principle we carry through is that we do discipline our children and that doing so is good for them. Precisely what form of discipline, I would say, is up to the parent(s). Smacking, naughty steps, time outs, grounding, treat removal, pocket money reduction, whatever form of discipline is appropriate to the situation and effective for the child I would say is fine.

However, there are a handful of commands in the Bible about our obedience to the state. And they are not merely good advice but are requirements for Christians to live out. Here’s one:

Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. Consequently, whoever rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves. (Romans 13:1-2)

These verses actually point out that when we’re disobeying the government and the laws of the land, we’re actually rebelling against God, because authority is God’s good gift to the world. And that’s even authority where it doesn’t follow a Judeo-Christian or democratic ethos.

There are some rare occasions when we have to disobey the state. For example, when the local Jewish rulers commanded the Apostles to stop sharing the gospel, they said that they “must obey God rather than human beings!” (Acts 5:29) When the state makes it illegal to do something that Christians are required to do, or illegal not to do something that Christians are required not to do, then we must obey God and rebel against the state.

So with smacking – I don’t think it’s required in the Bible that Christian parents must smack their children, only that parents must use some forms of discipline. And because of that, if it becomes illegal to smack, I would suggest we obey the state and use other forms of discipline instead.

How Not to Grow

Let’s face it, there are a lot of disadvantages to growing as a Christian. Growing is not passive but proactive. It therefore takes effort, focus, devotion and commitment, as well as other hard sounding words. It’s much easier just to be a coasting Christian who doesn’t put in any effort to growing. So here are my tips for how not to grow as a Christian:

Don’t Read the Bible: Since the Bible is the main way God speaks to us, if we avoid reading the Bible then God will be significantly limited from speaking to us. That means he won’t be as able to challenge us about how we know him, delight in him and live for him.

Don’t Memorise the Bible: Like the previous one, but even more so, remembering what the Bible says stores it up in your mind and heart so that it lingers in you for longer. If you should avoid reading the Bible then you should certainly avoid memorising it.

Don’t Pray: As God speaks to us through the Bible, so the main way we speak to God is through prayer. If we stop praying then our gratitude will cease and our recognition of who God is and affection for him will remain as it is. Prayer doesn’t help you stay the same so leave it out.

Don’t Gather with God’s People: If you’re trying not to grow then you’ve got to avoid other Christians. Christians have a terrible habit of encouraging each other. Such encouragement will challenge you to keep on going and growing in Christ, so make sure you avoid church, and even more so the smaller groups of church where such challenging relationships are intensified.

Don’t Listen to Sermons: Whether in church gatherings or online on your own, make sure you avoid all preaching of God’s Word. The preacher’s sole purpose is to help you grow, so the less you listen, the less you will grow.

Don’t Give: Your time and money are yours to use as you please aren’t they? And when you start giving away your time and money it stretches you to depend more upon God. Warning: depending more upon God is a sure means of growth. So don’t do it.

Don’t Listen to Christian Music: This can be really dangerous. Music has a way of stirring your emotions, and as emotions are stirred alongside Christian truths in lyrical form, so it can stir your affection for Christ. The obvious result would be growth. Best not to.

Don’t Read Christian Books, Blogs and Magazines: Many Christians find other Christian writings very helpful to their growth as it supplements their reading of the Bible. So if you don’t want to grow, make sure you subscribe to nothing, and don’t invest in any books.

Don’t Let Anyone Mentor You: A mentor can be a very helpful thing if you did want to grow. Having another more mature Christian come alongside you to read the Bible with you and talk through the things you find hard is always going to be a help in growth. So you’ll need to make sure you don’t get mentored.

Don’t Mentor Anyone: Funnily enough, mentoring a younger Christian can actually be a really great way of helping yourself to grow as a Christian, since it stretches you and encourages you. So you’ll want to avoid mentoring as much as being mentored.

Don’t Share the Gospel: Whether it’s being tested by hard questions, which stretch your understanding of God’s Word and commitment to Christ, or whether it’s the joy of seeing an unbeliever beginning to grasp the message of grace, evangelism has plenty of risks when it comes to avoiding growth. Best to avoid it altogether.

There are plenty of other things that we could mention, such as fasting, corporate confession, journaling your devotional life, and so on. But just make sure you avoid anything that sounds like it might stretch you, challenge you, cause you to think, to love, or to get agitated in your faith. Do nothing that sounds like it might be good for a Christian to do.

Of course, the problem is that where living thing don’t grow, instead they stagnate and die. When a pool of water doesn’t flow, it turns into poison. Where a muscle isn’t exercised and enlarged it atrophies and withers to nothing. When an animal is lying by the side of the road not moving, chances are there’s something seriously wrong. Likewise, the Christian who doesn’t grow has something seriously wrong with them, they’re withering away and will likely be poisonous.

Though it is hard work, takes focus, energy and discipline, and though it doesn’t always come easily, make sure you resolve to grow as a Christian this year.

(This article was original published in the January edition of our church magazine.)

photo credit: confidence, comely. 5’5″. via photopin (license)

Getting Ready for Christmas

Got to get ready for Christmas. I’ve got so much to do.

The wish lists need careful analysing. Who wants what? Can I get each present in time? There’s such a rush for the latest this or that, I hope they’re not going to be out of stock. Perhaps I’ll preorder it, just in case.

Mustn’t forget the batteries too. I can’t give that gift without batteries. I’ll need to check what size they take, was it double or triple A?

Decorations need sorting out. Time to get them down from the attic. Put the tree up and unravel the fairy lights. I’ve got to make sure I get the balance right of not too much tinsel, and the right combination of colours so it’s classy looking. Perhaps I’ll replace some of those baubles as they’re so last decade.

Oh and then there’s the other decorations. The wreath needs to go on the front door, hang a few lights outside too – nothing too garish or the neighbours might complain, but I’ve got to have something so people know I’m not a scrooge.

I’ve got a list of seventy Christmas cards that need writing. Friends from years gone by who it’s the only time we keep in touch. And all those distant relatives that I love to drop a short note in with. They all need writing carefully and thoughtfully.

Can’t forget the food. There’s always so much to sort out. My turkey has been on order since September, so that will be ok. But it’s all the trimmings, the sweets and snacks, the extra party food, and a good bottle of mulled wine (non-alcoholic of course!) Got to get some nice crackers, serviettes, and some delicious puddings. Not sure about Christmas pudding, it’s always a bit hit or miss.

Must plan all the visits too. Who’s coming to us again? I’ll just double check when exactly they’re coming. Oh and where was it we’re going? I’ll just double check they know when we’re coming as well.

Right, that’s all those things done, what else is left?

Church things of course!

Those cards need delivering, so I’ll see if I can take a pack or two. I’ll do them on my usual route. I must remember to offer to help with the refreshments for one of the events as well. Can’t leave it to just the usual ones or twos as they’ll be so busy.

I must remember to personally invite those I’d love to bring along as well. I’ll want to bring some non-Christian family members to one event. But my friends down the road who don’t know Jesus, they might be better at one of the other events.

And let me just make a note to pray for them and for others who come along. I’d love them to know Jesus so I’ll pop that on my prayer list for December. So important to pray in advance.

There’s something else I’m sure I’m missing.

What else do I need to get ready?

I’m almost certain I’m forgetting something that needs preparing…

My heart. Of course! Christmas is a time for me to worship Jesus as well. A time for me to rejoice in his kindness in coming to this world to be the one who we would worship – the very one who would save me from my sin.

I know, I’ll read the gospel accounts of his birth in Matthew and Luke. I’ll take note of how others respond, being filled with awe and delight, rejoicing and worshiping our king who was born. I’ll prepare myself by finding my joy and pleasure in Jesus in the run up to Christmas.

(Originally published in the December Church Magazine)

photo credit: Wouter de Bruijn Day 304 via photopin (license)

Celebrating the Reformation

Martin Luther

Last week was a very special anniversary. The 31st October marked 500 years to the day that a young monk, Martin Luther, nailed a list of 95 thesis to the church door in Wittenberg. By so doing, he intended to spark a public debate about some of the issues he saw with the Catholic Church.

Although he hadn’t yet come to a full realisation of the level of the issues with the church, he had begun to study the Bible carefully and in its original languages and was beginning to see the points at which the Catholic Church was in discord with the plain teaching of the Bible. He was persuaded that significant reform was needed in order to bring the church back in line with the message of the Bible. A handful of others were also beginning to make the same discoveries at the same time.

This reformation was not just an unfortunate happening, but a recovery of the gospel. The abuses of the church were such that it distorted the gospel, giving people a false hope in a law-based human-centred dependence. The gospel of grace needed to be recovered in order for people to hear and be saved. So the 500 year celebration is exactly that – a celebration.

Within the last century, as scholars and theologians have looked back over this reformation period in history, they have summarised up by teasing out five statements that are key aspects of the teaching of the reformers. They are united by the word “sola” which is Latin for “only” or “alone”.

Scripture Alone (Sola Scriptura): Whereas the Catholic Church insisted that church tradition and the declarations of the Pope held as much (if not more) authority as the Bible, the reformers taught that it is scripture alone that is our foundational knowledge for all things of faith, and this is the measure of any tradition or teaching of the church.

By Grace Alone (Sola Gratia): Whereas the Catholic teaching was that a combination of God’s grace with our merits of penance and good works, as well as the merits of the saints, the reforms insisted that it is God’s kind gift of love in grace that saves us.

Through Faith Alone (Sola Fide): Whereas Catholicism had for a long time taught that we are considered in the right before God by our works as much as by faith, those seeking to change the church explained the teaching of scripture – that it is only by dependant trust in Jesus and his atoning death that his righteousness is credited to us and by which we are declared in the right with God.

In Christ Alone (Solus Christus): Whereas it was held that our merits and the merits of the saints contribute to our salvation alongside the work of Jesus and that the saints as much as the Son can mediate between ourselves and the Father, the reformers upheld Christ’s life, death and resurrection as the only focus of our faith, as the only source of our salvation, and him as our only mediator between ourselves and the Father.

To God’s Glory (Alone Soli Deo Gloria): Whereas the works-based self-merited system of the Catholic Church brings glory to humans for having achieved their own salvation by working hard and being good enough, the basis for true salvation, as taught by the reformers, gives all the glory to God and to him alone.

These are not five irrelevant teachings of the past, but ongoing truths that the Bible itself teaches, that the Catholic Church still denies (even if their language has become more ambiguous) and that are crucial for us to hold to. Moreover, it is so easy for us to fall into the same pitfalls in other ways, such as by giving too heavy weight to traditions of the past, or by slipping into works to pay back for our grace. And so, the reformation is not merely something of the past, but something that continues today.

(If you’d like to know more about Luther and his 95 theses, then make sure you’re at prayer meetings over the coming year as Jonny will be covering them to help us in our praying. Originally published in the November edition of our Church Magazine.)

photo credit: micagoto sola scriptura via photopin (license)